I Am John's Stomach Pains.

On The Precipice of Mediocrity, Teetering

Tuesday, September 10, 2002


Enlightenment: Holz becomes a Creationist

So I was shaving this morning, when I realized one of my few problems with evolution.

These things happen... I swear one day I'll crack that whole perpetual motion dilemma while sitting on the john.

Anyway, my problem arose when I tried to shave the right side of my face. Being left handed, this is obviously a problem. I'm sure right handed folks have difficulty shaving the left side... and if not, you would in my bathroom. I have mirrors to the left and right of me, but not directly in front. It's annoying. So, in that span of 10 seconds where I try not to butcher the hell outta my face and failing miserably, it occured to me: in the million years of evolution that have created man, how come we have not all become ambidextrous. What evolutionary purpose does being stronger in one arm (and leg, and eye, etc.) have? I'm sure life would be far easier for the human being to have equal strength.

Perhaps one reason is the whole "throwing vs. catching" mentality. If we were all equally strong in both hands perhaps our brains would fry in trying to decide which hand to catch with when someone throws something at us. However, that theory is easily discounted when we see that there are numerous people who are currently ambidextrous, and none of them die in horrible apple throwing accidents.

J.B. Sattler has a different idea... he believes Ambidextrous People Are Brain Damaged.

I'm sure if I was motivated, I could probably find a definative answer, but you know what... I'm just going to face the fact that we aren't all ambidextrous because God made us that way because he wants life to be hard... and that's why I can't shave comfortably.

posted by Holz | 10:41 AM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0)


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Right Now I'm Probably...
Lost, Heroes, 24, Criminal Minds
Brobdingnagian Bards
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman
Final Fantasy XII
Running... hopefully
My Amazon.com Wish List
Comic Quote of the Week
"It's trying to end the suffering of everything. Do you want to discuss our options? Maybe together we can, you know, workshop?"

"Okay, best way to stop a ten-story godlike monster from destroying existence? I'm gonna go with hitting, you have anything?"

"You took mine."

Wesley and Angel, Angel: After The Fall #15

Who Am I?
Name: Holz
Home: Sonoma County, California
About Me: I'm a comfortador.
See my complete profile

Ozymandias, DrOzymandias, Darth Angelus, Darque Feonix, Trip McNeely
Kicking ass for:
29 years
UWing Systems Design Specialist
Walking Theme:
Believe It Or Not by Joey Scarbury
Most watched movie:
The Princess Bride
Most read book:
The Dark Tower Series by Stephen King

Where Do I Go?
Blogs I Will Most Likely Steal Ideas From
The Past
Some of My Favorite Entries
"Let a man get away with fuckin' you once, you stay bent over so's he can fuck you again whenever he damn well pleases. An' if one man can do it? Another will too. An' another, an' another still. So's being fucked, that's yer life. 'Til who you were, you ain't. 'Cause all you are is an asshole."
100 Bullets #42