On The Precipice of Mediocrity, Teetering
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| I Am John's Stomach Pains. On The Precipice of Mediocrity, Teetering |
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Friday, January 31, 2003 Vegas, Baby, Vegas! Man, I love Sin City. The lights, the drinking, the partying, the drinking, the gambling, the drinking... Las Vegas is my kinda town. Plus, she's been nice to me more often than she's been a bitch, so I'll always love her for that... and hell, it may be a bit masochistic, but I even love her when she grind my balls with her heels. I love Vegas that much. Hopefully, this weekend will be no exception, as I plan to be partying at The Beach from one in the morning til' dawn tonight (sadly my flight doesn't get in til' midnight), hitting The Stratosphere roller coaster on Saturday, and rollin' dem' bones at the craps table on Sunday. And in between all that, I'm sure there's gonna be loads of memorable experiences. I've never left My Girl V unhappy... Man, I am so money... posted by Holz | 4:15 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Wednesday, January 29, 2003 Jeezus Fucking Christ this Osbournes Pepsi Twist commercial is so fucking annoying. I've seen it four times in the past 5 minutes. Only redeeming factor is that Kelly looks kinda cute, but even that's not enough... posted by Holz | 9:01 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Tuesday, January 28, 2003 Blogging the State of the Union We'll see how long I can keep this up... I'll be updating the upper most layer every time, so this should be read backwards (if read at all)... *Not a bad response. I like this guy. Not much more to say than that... *America is still too vulnerable... but what about the Ballistic Missile Program?!? And the lasers that are sure to come! *Thank God they're challenging the domestic fiscal actions. I have no problem being supportive on foreign affairs, but the domestic agenda is crap. *"But to be strong abroad, we have to be strong at home." Had to be said. *Did Bush even mention Osama Bin Laden's name? *I have no idea who this guy is... ***DEMOCRATIC RESPONSE*** *And that's it... surprisingly very little malapropisms from The Global Potentate GW. Nice split between domestic and foreign affairs. But I just realized, did he even focus on the State of the Union? *So he keeps mentioning this Coalition of others who are with us in our fight... did he actually mention any specific country? Not even the UK? *LOL, I think Ted Kennedy is asleep. *Oops, my bad, he just said we all believe in the armed forces, now they're cheering... *How come I never saw anyone in uniform cheering once? *Okay, this is gonna be horrible, but I just thought of it and it wouldn't be fair not to say it: Saddam kills whole villages in his country... so if this continues, doesn't this mean soon, they'll be no more people living in Iraq, and he'll have no power? Man, I am so going to hell... *GW said something like the only reason Hussein would horde huge amounts of weapons is to dominate, intimidate, and attack. So that's why we have nuclear and biological weapons, right? Right? *We've found 19 canisters of something, but don't know where the other 29,000 containers are? Hmm... I know there's a sarcastic comment here, but I'm gettin' tired... *Hussein has shown utter contempt to the United Nations... man, the joke is almost too easy... *Heh-heh, we can't let Iraq become the next North Korea... but what about the current North Korea!?!?!? *America won't be blackmailed by North Korea... but we'll pay a ransom. *"The path of this nation does not depend on the decision of others"... oooh, U.N., you just got bitch slapped by the leader of the free world! Rules? Warcrimes? Wha? Screw y'all, we're gonna kill all those motherfuckers, and you can't do a thing about it! *When he was talking about biological weapons being sold to others or used in blackmail, I immediately thought of The Rock... that movie ruled. I mean, the biological threat didn't rule, that sucked... but man, Sean Connery kicks ass *Terrorist Threat Integration center... one place with all the information on terrorists organizations... is it just me or should they simply call the group T.A.R.G.E.T. *Woo-hoo! Ballistic missiles will soon no longer be a threat! Star Wars rules! *War on Terror at 35 after... wow. Glad to hear we're winning... those four ghosts who didn't come through the Canada border a while ago really scared me *Glad he's discussing AIDS, it's been in the background for a while. And the foreign crisis is getting crazy... here's hoping 3 Billion a year is gonna be able to help... I doubt it's enough though. We'll see. *Wow, the first mention of foreign affairs at the halfway point... interesting choice. *No human cloning. It's still far off, we can't even clone a dog yet, we ain't gonna be cloning any humans anytime soon. *Partial birth abortion... no comment, only because I can't get into it. *Drug addiction... a single destructive desire to fund terrorists, you dirty dirty pot addicts! And once again, the only way to turn away from drugs is by the church... wonder how many men have turned to drugs after being molested by their priests... oh, I know, I know, that's a minority... I don't fucking care. *Faith-based initiative? Is that the actual name of one of his plans? Is this like a government sponsored Crusade? *Woo-hoo! $1.2 Billion for Hydrogen powered cars! Where the hell did this come from? And should I be worried about explosions the likes of that blimp (sorry pulling a blank) every time we have fender benders? Probably not... good job GW. *He wants more local power... but keep our beautiful forests... are we gonna bring up the Alaskan Wildlife Preserve again? *I'm actually supportive of his plan to limit medical malpractice costs, but a $250,000 limit is just wrong. I would say somewhere between 1 - 5 million, not too sure where yet *Whoa, just saw Laura for the first time tonight... she looks just like a doll of June Cleaver *Why oh why is privatization of Social Security still being considered? The NASDAQ recently dipped below 8000... stop trying to push this idiotic plan *Oh man... balanced budget.. spending discipline in Washington... OMG, that's too funny *Hilarious to see the split in the audience of those sitting and cheering... I always remember most people cheering together with Clinton *He's not gonna pass our problems now to other administrations... god this is too easy... taxes, social security, war on terror... Only gonna be a problem for two more years *Everyone gets a job... how can state governments keep employing people if they have to take up the load after the tax cut? *"Save millions of lives from a terrible disease"... wonder if he's gonna comment on the fact he's appointing a gay hater to the AIDS commitee posted by Holz | 6:08 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (3) There's this new song on the radio that I found absolutely hilarious, and I crank up whenever it comes on. The lyrics don't really do it justice, so I recommend downloading it. Here's the lyrics though Liam Lynch - United States of whatever posted by Holz | 5:49 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Monday, January 27, 2003 Things That Ruled All Your Asses Yesterday posted by Holz | 12:27 AM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Tuesday, January 21, 2003 Holz's Obligatory Top Ten Movie List of 2002 Sadly I missed alot of movies this year (Adaptation, Bowling for Columbine, Rules of Attraction, Catch Me If You Can), but of the ones I did see, here's my thoughts on my 10 favorite, plus a few others I had to comment on... 10) Jackass: The Movie - I'm really not surprised I haven't seen this on any other's 'best of' lists. It's definately not a safe pick. But I don't think I have laughed so hard at a movie since South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut, and that's saying something. This movie (which, can you imagine if it gets nominated for best documentary?) succeeded in every aspect it set out to do. It was rude, crude, lewd, and many times, in the nude. Many elitists shun this flick and label it as the downfall of society... and you know what... they may be right, but I'll be laughing the entire time. 9) The Ring - A damn scary thriller, with hardly any blood or gore. Sure, it suffers from the 'little kids can be so scary' cliche that's permeated Hollywood since The 6th Sense, but there are numerous jump out of your seat moments. Plus, the horse scene still scares the crap outta me, but that's mainly because I have hippophobia. 8) Star Wars: Attack of the Clones - Despite this movies faults (of which there are many), I still absolutely love it, and not only because of the Yoda fight. To see the arrogance of the all-powerful Jedi council, the manipulation one man can have on entire civilization, the realization that Anakin didn't suddenly become Darth Vader - he always was... and okay, the kick ass Yoda fight, this movie is awesome. I was one of the apologists of The Phantom Menace, but when it comes to Episode 2, I am a staunch defender 7) Blade 2 - Hot damn, does this flick just rule all balls. Nonstop action from start to finish, probably the scariest (i.e. most disgusting) villains since The Thing, crack-me-up throwaway lines, and a visual style that makes me physically drool in anticipation of del Toro's Hellboy, in a word this movie is gorgeous. Easily surpassed the original in terms of out and out fun, destined to be remembered as one of the greatest comic book movies ever. Marvel rules AOLWBDC's ass... 6) The Road to Perdition - It's been a while since I caught this, but I still remember how much I fell in love with Sam Mendes' directing skills. He doesn't employ any fancy techiniques, his camera is incredibly static, but his eye is pitch perfect in finding the perfect space to place his shot. It's almost like your a fly on the wall experiencing everything that happens. The scene from Hanks and Newman in the basement is destined to be shown over and over again at awards shows for 50 years, it is that damn good. The kid gives good performance, and Jude Law freaks me out... a predictable ending, both otherwise a great film 5) Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers - What can I say that hasn't already been said? In a word, this movie is breathtaking. The tracking shots, the effects, the acting, the costumes. I could go on, but everyone on every other site already has. Now, the reason I don't have this higher is that I just wasn't as enthralled in the story as I was with Fellowship. I understand that the story is that they are broken, but many times I caught myself sighing to myself 'god, enough with the trees, get back to the fighting'. Maybe on a second (or third) viewing this may change... 4) Signs - This is a first... a Shyamalan flick isn't number one for the year. Both The 6th Sense and Unbreakable topped my lists in the year they were released. Oh well, this is still a great film. The thing I like about Night's films is that he never takes the easy road. Instead of focusing on how the government, military, or cable repairmen deal with an alien invasion, he focuses on one single family. Are there problems? Of course, the end is hamfisted religious, the cupboard scene is scary but in reality silly, and the weakness revelation is unbelievable, but you know what, I go to movies with a suspension of disbelief firmly entrenched... I also have to give props for Night's acting scene, which he did to perfection. 3) Y Tu Mama Tambien - I'm usually not a fan of foreign flicks, mainly because I rarely have the time to invest to see them, but this movie was perfect. On the surface, a simple road-sex comedy, but underneath a story about the differences in class, age, and gender. Sure, there are sex scenes, but none of them are highly erotic, they're real - intimate, awkward, and fast. There is love, fun and happiness throughout, but there's also an undercurrent of pain that you can see in the camera styles of Cuarón. He sticks with a scene for a good long time, long after other directors would switch to something more exciting. I'm interested to see what he'll do with the hext two Harry Potter flicks. 2) Punch-Drunk Love - For the second time, Paul Thomas Anderson has broken my top three of the year (previously with Magnolia). What makes this movie so great is the sheer anger that is released throughout. Is it scary that I relate with this character so much? I may not have as much rage in me Barry Egan, but I can't tell you how many times I've felt like lashing out as he does. The love story is sublime, as a viewer, you try to understand what exactly Lena sees in Barry, and what kind of pillow talk involves the phrases "I love you so much I want to smash your face in with a sledgehammer" and "I love you so much I want to rip out your eyeballs and suck on them and then punch you in the nuts.". Easily destined to go on my DVD shelf forever. 1) Spider-Man - In 2000 I raved at how X-Men and Unbreakable were quite possibly the greatest comic book movies of all time, and they would be hard to top. Sam Raimi answered that challenge and succeeded in spades. I never thought Spiderman would work as a movie. The rich backstory was needed, the corny one liners would come off lame, the costume would look incredibly stupid. Idiot me, in just over two hours, we were given everything Spider-man was, is, and forever will be. Just a kid trying to do right in the world. From the initial trailers, tv spots, and music videos, this had me hooked. This was the ultimate fanboy hero, the underdog, the geek, who sacrifices happiness not because he wants to, but because he has a calling that cannot be ignored. Please let this franchise never die... Honorable Mentions *About Schimdt - great acting, funny at parts, but overall very depressing *Chicago - loved the whole experience, but afterwards I had forgotten most of it. Doesn't really resinate as much as Moulin Rouge did *Harry Potter & The Chamber of Secrets - The Star Wars of our time, a fun romp, tis' just too bad these kids are growing up so fast. Disappoinments *Minority Report - visually mesmermizing, surprsingly cool acitng, but otherwise fairly bland. Was the end a dream? Do I care? *Star Trek: Nemesis - This was supposed to be great. It came out average. Nowhere near First Contact, Voyage Home, or Wrath of Khan. *xXx - exciting and fun and all, but was hoping for more than the usual. I found Richard Grieco's If Looks Could Kill more enjoyable than this. posted by Holz | 8:10 AM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Just saw a SlimFast commercial on TV. This chick is walking through a field, and she says "Slim-Fast made it so easy". At the bottom of the screen is the disclaimer... it says "Losing weight is not easy". I don't know why... found that funny. posted by Holz | 8:10 AM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Sunday, January 19, 2003 At The Edge of the Internet, Lies a Blog to Adventure As you can see I've been slackin' with the blog as of late. Alot of that has to do with work. I've been quite swamped over the past week, and my internet connection has been on the fritz. You have no idea how much time I've been puttin' in trying to get all this adware and hijackware off of both of my computers. Using Ad-aware on my home and work computers, I found over 500 adwares on my computer. Plus, I had been gettin' hijacked by Xupiter and Hunbar... thankfully, I found BHODemon to help remove them from both my drives. Sometimes I hate being computer illiterate in the advanced crap. Anyway, my weekend has been fairly uneventful. I was planning on seeing Ghost of the Robot up in Sacremento, but after listening to some of their songs I downloaded, I decided they were pretty much crap so I held against it. Instead I spent some time catching up on some things I've been meaning to, cleaning up and watching DVDs. I know this is gonna sound really sad, but I pretty much watched all of Stargate: SG1 Season 1 on DVD... at least those eps I had never seen before, which was over half of the season. Highly underrated show, it's a fun ride. Plus, it stars MacGuyver, so that's all good. I also finally got around to cleaning my car, so people at work won't be giving me any weird looks when we go out to lunch anymore. It was gettin' to be pretty bad. Worst part of cleaning: I opened my trunk and discovered some of my laundry detergent I kept stored in there had spilled... boy did that suck. I also started preparing the big clean-up that is Holz's Apartment. Seeing as I'll be moving out of here in less than a month, tis' time to start prepping. Spent today watching football... fucking Bucs... this was supposed to be the Eagles year... they were supposed to roll over Tampa Bay in the f'n cold, then have a helluva Superbowl against Oakland. Again, I say, fuck the Bucs. Sorta watching the Golden Globes, but I was in an EOnline chat during the east coast airing, so nothing was a surprise. Awesome to see my boy Michael Chiklis win again (despite the Shadow Slave's thoughts), and again give a piss poor acceptance speech. Dude, you are an awesome drama actor, don't try comedy. Renee gave a sweet an impassioned speech, Sharon Stone was an embarrassment to everyone there, and in my honest opinion, Laura Linney was the hottest one there. Overall, glad to see Chicago got all the praise (althouth CZJ shoulda gotten the award for Supporting Actress), pissed that Alias and Two Towers didn't win their awards, and still indifferent about the movie About Schimdt... hopefully I'll get my thoughts complete on that flick soon. posted by Holz | 10:24 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Wednesday, January 15, 2003 Honest to god quote I just heard come from the cube next to me: Webster's defination of growth does not mean shrinkage, we've been over this. Yeah, it'schildish, but I burst out laughing when I heard that. posted by Holz | 2:25 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Monday, January 13, 2003 Insomniac Blogging It's been a while since I've puled an all nighter, but I have a feeling I'll be pullin' one tonight. It's 4:30am, and I doubt I'll fall asleep before I have to wake up for work tomorrow. Oh well, maybe this'll just mean I'll get to bed early tomorrow... one can hope. Anyway, I was all set to get to bed, when I saw Armageddon was on FX. so I watched that for an hour and a half. Then I saw that The Ref was ending on another channel, so I caught that. Then an hour of Sports Night. Then another hour of Saved by the Bell. I am such a slave to the idiot box... posted by Holz | 4:39 AM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Thursday, January 09, 2003 I know I've been neglecting my baby this week... so sorry, but I've been so beat lately. Just wanted to point out that there's a new Daredevil trailer on the net, and save for the crap song in the background, it is perfect. Only thing to look forward to on Valentine's Day. posted by Holz | 11:29 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Monday, January 06, 2003 Is it sadisitic of me that I want to pull the Chia-hair out of my Chia-Shaggy, simply for the pure joy of it? posted by Holz | 4:08 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Saturday, January 04, 2003 So y'know those 20 reasons I mentioned yesterday about me losing a hundred bucks? Well, here's the same guy pointing out just why I didn't. posted by Holz | 12:30 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Friday, January 03, 2003 So, this isn't really important, but I got my first headline posted onto Fark today for this cookie story. Many of the other farkers pointed out it was a repeat, and that I was a thief, but you know what, since I haven't gone Total Fark yet, I was oblivious. Oh well. UPDATE: Been deleted from Fark... double oh well. posted by Holz | 4:23 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Damnit. Didn't pass my exam. This sucks. This means to pass in May I will become an even more socially-reclusive hermit. Apologies in advance. posted by Holz | 1:20 PM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) Gone, but not forgotten, we get our first Dumbass of the Day for the new year! posted by Holz | 11:38 AM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) 20 reasons why it's looking like Holz will lose a hundred bucks today. UPDATE: Well, Slate still thinks I may have a chance posted by Holz | 9:19 AM | Rant & Rave, Bitches! (0) |
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"Let a man get away with fuckin' you once, you stay bent over so's he can fuck you again whenever he damn well pleases. An' if one man can do it? Another will too. An' another, an' another still. So's being fucked, that's yer life. 'Til who you were, you ain't. 'Cause all you are is an asshole." 100 Bullets #42 | |||||
